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Post by Spencer Adams on Oct 19, 2017 19:23:23 GMT -6
Theme:
Costume Contest
1 RP, 2k word limit. Competitors must write an RP with their character playing “someone else” ex. Pirate, Superhero, etc. between the start time of 12am central time and end time of 12am central time the following day.
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Post by Corey Black on Oct 24, 2017 19:23:21 GMT -6
Look! Up in the sky! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No.. it’s.. it’s..
THE PURPLE PRINCE!
Sailing through the blue sky of Minneapolis, Minnesota is the Purple Prince, a man cased within a metallic suit painted purple and gold. Embers and flame shoot from his feet and hands as he streaks across the skyline, landing on a skyscraper. A door opens, he steps in and other mechanical devices come out from the floor, peeling away the suit. Out steps a normal man, long hair, beard, oddly well dressed. He is met at the bar of his penthouse by a butler.
Corey Black
Ah, finally.
Butler
How was your trip to Iran, sir?
Corey Black
Wonderful, JAYSON, thank you. I have defeated the group who has had a stranglehold on the world’s supply of butthurt cream.
JAYSON
I knew you’d be the one to take down The Insane Clown Tolerance.
Corey Black
It took but a single strike from the most deadly weapon in all of existence.
JAYSON
I thought only Odinson Balforeiggin was worthy?!
Corey Black
You thought wrong, jobber.
Corey reaches his hand out and through the wall comes a mighty purple glowing hammer, encrypted upon it these words.
Whosoever holds this hammer,
if he be worthy,
shall possess the power of Odinson
JAYSON
You wield the mystical Banhammer
Corey Black
And with it, I shall smite any and all who even slightly annoy me. Even you.
JAYSON
So with the power of the Gods, what use is your suit?
Corey Black
Fuckin’ flare, biiiiitch!
RED LIGHTS, BEEPING SOUND, RED LIGHTS, BEEPING SOUND
INCOMING TRANSMISSION FROM JOHN RABID
Jon Raybd
Black! We’ve got word that a race of alien have invaded Earth many moons ago and have been posing as humans ever since!
Corey Black
Dear GOD…
Jack Ronald
I think you know what to do.. REFORM THE LEGENDVENGERS! You’re Earth’s only hope!
JAYSON
I was in Earth’s Mightiest Stable once.
Jimmy Rabbit
Yeah but you’re not a Legendvenger, fgt, you’re just a sidekick.
JAYSON
I’ll prep the dinner. Sigh.
HARD CUT
NEW SCENE
LEGENDVENGER TOWER
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA
DINING HALL
Ah this is a great feast, that douchefuck butler JAYSON probably ordered this food from KFC like a goddamn pleb. Either way, seated as a grand table is Corey Black, the Purple Prince. Also seated is a man clad in black and red with a shield, he is CAPTAIN DIGGER with superhuman reflexes and the ability to squash dorks in voting contests. An empty seat rests for Odinson Balforeiggen, a fallen Legendvenger. Next is a large green hulking mass of humanity, weird samurai style haircut, big teeth – TORTURE THE TROLL. And finally, a vanilla midget Uncle Seff.
Torture the Troll takes an entire KFC chicken breast and swallows it whole. Captain Digger uses his smashing shield to break open a biscuit and drop in the tears of those who he beats in popularity contests, I mean butter. Corey Black holds his hammer high into the air and explains the issue.
Corey Black
Aye, Legendvengers, welcome to our first meeting in quite a while. I’ve been informed by the leader of SCHWIFTY, Jayhahn Rabboild, that aliens have invaded and could be posing as any human they wish. There are no leads. Everyone in this room could be an alien.
Torture the Troll
Why did you get to keep your name?
Captain Digger
I should smash that 4th wall break like I smash everyone who doesn’t vote for me, which is nobody, so carry on.
Corey Black
I miss Odinson, he wouldn’t let you nerds get out of line.
Captain Digger
He was our leader for a reason, now it’s you, and you’re too focused on your extracurriculars than you are this team.
Torture the Troll
He’s right, you know, Katy Perry makes better music anyway.
Corey Black
You’re supposed to be a troll, how the hell are you articulate?
Torture the Troll
I don’t play by anybody’s rules, you know that.
Captain Digger
Fight me, but we must let the people decide the winner!
Corey Black
Fuck, you’re both useless, I’ll do this on my own. I know just where to start.
Corey walks off leaving Torture the Troll and Captain Digger to munch on KFC, JAYSON looks on from the corner crying. And touching himself.
NEW SCENE BAYBEEEE
The Purple Prince zooms in and lands in the typical as fuck S U P E R H E R O P O S E. He is on a street lined with motorcycles. A booming roar from the distance. Up rides a bike that has to be as tall as a house, with a man even bigger upon it.
Purple Prince
I knew I’d find you here, Mountain Bates.
Mountain Bates
Gwah, what do you want pipsqueak? Mountain’s gotta eat and learn up some dirty Democrats with the word of Robert E. Lee!
Purple Prince
If anyone was going to know where to find illegal aliens, it would be you.
Mountain Bates
Hawah, Jarn Roidbot finally found out the illegals were among us and sent you? What’re you gonna do?
Purple Prince don’t fuck around, homie. BAM BANHAMMER TO THE GUT, EXPULLING ALL THE WHITE, GOOEY TOTALLY NOT JIZZ FROM MOUNTAIN BATES’ INNARDS!
Mountain Bates
FUUUUUUUU THAT WAS MY MIDDAY SNACK!
It’s literally flooding the streets.
Purple Prince
Talk, fat boy!
Mountain Bates
Now I am even more hungry than before! Rargh. They’re in UCI, posing as pro wrestlers. Go there, you’ll find your aliens, and maybe – if you aren’t a lame-boy – you’ll figure out the truth!
Purple Prince
Thanks, now fuck back off to fuckville where you belong and never enter my story again, forced or otherwise.
Purple Prince flies off into the night sky, leaving Mountain Bates to try to suck up as much semen from the road as possible.
NEW SCENE YET AGAIN
UCI
IT’S A SHIP
Purple Prince lands on SS UCI, the satellite boat of the SS WCF. Lots of weird creatures roam around this boat, television cameras set up to record them fight for money and fame and whatever else. Purple Prince is smack dab right in the middle of every last person on the SS UCI.
Purple Prince
Alas, your savior has arrived. I am here to bring this place back from the depths, and to rid the scum from the deck. I, the Iron Legendvenger, demand the aliens step forward and be judged.
From the back steps a slimy, tentacle monster with eyes and a mouth. It somehow speaks.
Tentacle Monster
I’m an alien, my name is Rod, I come from the planet…
Everyone superkicks that cunt to pieces.
Purple Prince
No, I mean an alien posing as a human, but thanks. I think. This place is strange.
Nobody steps forward.
Purple Prince
Fine, I will have to smite all of you back to the motherland until I find the alien scum!
One by one, Purple Prince boots the UCI contingent back to SS WCF, where they toil in mid-card hell. All except one. One with sunglasses. This being stands tall, nose to the sky.
Purple Prince
You’re the remaining soul, you must be the alien. I have been sent here by Jarborn Radinsky to eradicate you from the face of this planet. You take our jobs, you take our welfare, you are kinda fabulous looking but I won’t be swayed, it is my mission to make sure you and those like you are eliminated. I have already acquired the Hypermedia Crystal from your puny vessel, once you are out of the way I will march forward and crush everyone else on my way to taking your whole boat – maybe in like 2019, whenever I get around to it.
The alien goes to move but nay, Purple Prince is too fast. He shoots a purple laser into the eyes of the alien and smites that sumbitch with the BANHAMMER. Rainbow goop flies out of the now squished cranial cavity of the alien, the body crumbles to the deck as the Purple Prince has fulfilled his duties.
Purple Prince
I should report back to Jammies Rhadinborg.. eh maybe later.
Purple Prince takes off, flying back to LEGENDVENGER TOWER where Torture the Troll and Captain Digger are picking on Snowflake Twilight.
Torture the Troll
You’re a dude.
Captain Digger
Totes, Dave.
Snowflake Twilight
Why don’t anyone love me?
Captain Digger crushes that snowflake with his shield, Torture the Troll leaps into the air and shouts some slurs but then lands on his back and gets texts about insider info. He’ll probably spoil stuff later. Purple Prince lands and is met by machines removing the suit, JAYSON standing in the cold air without a shirt.
JAYSON
Sir, can I borrow a shirt? You have seventeen thousand of them.
Corey Black
And get that jobber stink on them? God, I barely want to talk to you, that means I have to breathe your air, let alone sacrifice a shirt.
JAYSON
You have shirts you’ve never even seen before.
Corey Black
Fuck you nerd, I just crushed an alien, you should be at the front of the line to suck my dick.
JAYSON
I always am.
Corey Black
God I hate you.
BANHAMMER.
FIN.
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L Verez {L-7}
Hypermedia Champion
Open minds and positive vibes!
Posts: 289 
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Post by L Verez {L-7} on Oct 24, 2017 22:51:51 GMT -6
Trees rustle. A shadowy imagine burst threw the trees in the night. It leaps from branch to branch. Another smaller, lighter shadow is right behind. You could almost call it a white shadow… the bigger shadow speaks, which seems to be a female figure cloaked in a dark indigo. The smaller white figure seems to be a feline of some sort.
L-V: How far until we reach the end of the woods, Shadow?
White Shadow: Not much further. Once we reach the end of the woods, the ocean will be just nearby. And when a big body of water is near, you know who arrives…
L-V: Corey Black Hook! And then we can retrieve what he stole from our clan!
White Shadow: Speaking of… he's brought company.
They look below and see some pirates throwing rocks and bottles, laughing and berating the cloaked assassins.
White Shadow: We must strike with haste, Vision. We can't let Black Hook get away.
L-V: Right! Let's make quick work out of these hooligans!
Vision flips over and throws shurikens towards some of the pirates, slicing their cheeks, throwing a smoke bomb as she hits the ground.
White Shadow: A ninja named Lunar Vision using a smoke bomb… how metaphorical.
And that metaphor was realized. The smoke begins to clear, and Lunar Vision is the last one standing. All the pirates around her are on the ground groaning and grunting in pain.
Lunar Vision: Come on, Shadow! Who knows what else Black Hook has in store for us.
White Shadow: Yes. Let's move quickly, before he sails away.
The multi color-eyed feline and the Lactose Free Assassin continue their journey through the forest, having to surpass many of Black Hook's obstacles.
Lunar Vision: Bear traps? Really? Does he not know that we barely ever touch the ground?
White Shadow: Maybe they're a distraction.
Lunar Vision: That is a fantastic point, Shadow!
And distractions, they were. Down below were simple booby traps, such as trip wires and false floorings. Above, however, were tied up suicide bombers, with silly attempts at camouflaging with the trees.
Lunar Vision: Look out!
Just barely, they were able to escape the bombers, one of the blasts tripping Lunar. If she hadn't been able to grasp one of the tree branches, she would have fallen right through a false flooring trap.
White Shadow: Can you regain stability, Vision?
Lunar Vision: Yes, it's no problem!
Vision flips over to the next branch, landing on her feet. There's more pirates however, throwing knives her way. With their quick reflexes, they are able to deflect the knives with their shurikens. How White Shadow is able to grasp a shuriken with his tail, as well as his teeth, the world may never know.
Lunar Vision: There it is! The ocean’s just up ahead!
White Shadow: With company as well…
White Shadow is correct. A large group of pirates on the sandy beach surround a giant ship in the ocean. A large test awaits Vision and her feline companion.
Lunar Vision: It's a good thing we're not alone!
Right on cue, a smoke bomb appears. Once it clears, four figures appear. Two more felines, both black and white. A medium furred feline is on the shoulder of a lavender cloaked woman with white hair and eyes. A longer, slightly mangy furred feline is laying atop The head of a much larger, black and purple cloaked creature with one eye.
With great haste, they all jump down to the sanded floor and throw smoke bombs toward the charging pirates. They're outnumbered, but more skilled. The pirates blinded, but adamant. They wildly swing their cutlasses and shoot their pistols at the clouded assassins. The Silent Cyclone is able to thrash about a big group of pirates. Lunar Vision striking from afar with her shurikens, slicing any enemy that dares go near her. The three felines, White Shadow, Masked Marvel, and Wild-Eye, all scratch, claw, and bite down at their enemies. The Lavish Rush uses her tools to great use to trap the remaining pirates. The first battle was won, but the war is far from over.
Wild-Eye: Big ship! Big trouble! Much fun!
Lavish Rush: Black Hook is near, but he's bound to have more tricks up his handless sleeve. We'll deal with any remaining obstacles. We'll leave Black Hook to you, Vision.
Lunar Vision: Are you sure? I don't want you guys to miss out on the fun of taking down our main enemy.
White Shadow: This is your fight, Vision. You two have been combating for many moons. Now is the time to end it.
Lunar Vision: Alright… let's move!
The ninjas rush toward the ship, but the pirates were prepared. A horn sounds off, and the pirates give off a loud war cry. Cannons blast off the side of the ship, targeting the ninjas. They dodge them quickly, however. The ninjas make it to the water, using their chakra to run through to the ship, and up the high wall. The jump up to the ship, immediately surrounded by pirates. Cyclone leads, using his size advantage to charge down a large amount of the pirates. The others make sure to keep the pirates occupied, while Vision makes her way into the interior of the ship. She can hear Black Hook taunting her from afar as she fights through pirates and dodges some remaining traps.
Black Hook: All alone, are ye, little Vision? How many times do we have to do this for me to prove that you're nothing but a worthless goody two shoes that can't get the job done!
As Vision battles one of the pirates, she notices a trip wire near him, and kicks him towards the wire, jumping backwards and taking cover right afterwards. A hidden mini cannonball shoots the pirate to the wall, knocking him out cold. She dashes through the doorway, jumping over a bear trap. A pirate behind her falls for the trap, blocking the others from going through. Vision uses the rest of her shurikens to turn the floor into a spike trap, before the remaining pirates could chase after her.
Vision slowly makes her way through the big set of doors. As soon as it creaks, a gun is pointed at her head. Through the door is a black bearded man almost twice Vision’s size, wearing a black, purple, and gold hat and jacket. The room behind him is large, with a lot of equipment on the sides.
Lunar Vision: Corey Black Hook…
Black Hook: That's Captain Black Hook to ye! Trying to take me loot, I see.
Lunar Vision: That belongs to our clan, Hook! You didn't discover it, you stole it!
Black Hook: Aye. But now it's mine, and I don't plan on giving it up anytime soon, scallywag! I have the prize now!
Vision takes advantage of Hook's big mouth, and hits a palm strike to his elbow, knocking off the pistol from his hand. She push kicks him straight afterwards.
Lunar Vision: You're nothing but a conceited thief. An intruder! You came to our home, and took our prized possession! Now it's time for me to take it back, and finish you once and for all.
Black Hook: I'm not the one intruding this time, meat. You're in MY ship, causing havoc towards MY people. My family! You're no better than I!
Lunar Vision: This ship is filled with a bunch of low life criminals! If it weren't for your dastardly crew, you wouldn't have gotten nearly as far as you have.
Black Hook: Aye, but I am the Captain of this ship! I tell these people what to do, and how to do it.
Lunar Vision: That's what you call a family?
Hook quickly takes a nearby cutlass, and slices Vision’s shoulder.
Lunar Vision: Aggh!
Black Hook: Arrg! You're supposed to say arrg! Now you've ruined the joke!
Vision makes some quick hand signs, and casts a blade of chakra on her left hand. She strikes, just barely catching Black Hook's right eye.
Black Hook: ARRRRRRRRRG!!! Damn you, you tiny, purple bitch! How do you shrouded freaks use such abilities!?
Lunar Vision: A man like you should never be able to wield the powers of ninjutsu! And especially not genjutsu!
Black Hook suddenly finds himself surrounded by fire, his wrists and feet chained. A flaming figure appears before him.
Flaming Figure: You have committed many sins, Corey Black Hook. Murder, theft, torture, slavery. You might as well be named Black Heart.
Black Hook: It's Black Hook! It's Captain Black Hook, dammit! I'm the King of all the Seven Seas! I can do anything I want! No one can touch me!
The figure walks into Black Hook. The tortured burning causes him to writhe in pain for what feels like an eternity. From Vision's eyes, Black Hook is just standing there screaming. She kicks him in the head to knock him out. She hears, and feels, a big thud from behind her afterwards. She goes through the doors and sees Cyclone surrounded by the remaining pirates. Lavish Rush is right beside him.
Lavish Rush: Is it done?
Lunar Vision: Almost… Cyclone, I'm going to need your help.
The Cyclops nods. They make their way back to the exterior of the ship. Cyclone sits Black Hook in front of the plank. Vision slaps him back to consciousness.
Black Hook: What the… what!? How did I get here!?
Lunar Vision: End of the line, Hook. Your reign of terror is finished.
Black Hook looks at his crew. All beaten, knocked out, bloodied, but none dead. He then looks behind him at the waters he calls his own. He begins to laugh, going from a quiet chuckle to a full on maniacal belting.
Black Hook: My dear Lunar Vision. How many times will this happen between us, aye? Just like with my crew, and with our other meetings, you won't finish the job. You know in your heart of pure, boring little goodness that you can't kill me! You can't take me out!
Lunar Vision grabs Corey by the collar of his jacket and takes him to the edge of the plank. Her eyes turning fierce.
Lunar Vision: They might have helped you, but you've been the Mastermind behind all this treachery! This has gone on for long enough, Black!
Black Hook: Hahahahaha! You don't have the gall! I'm going to live forever, thanks to you! I could take your little friends, and kill them one by one! I can take everything and everyone you love away and you still won--- Gahhhhh…!!
Vision slices his throat with her chakra blade. With a tear running down her face, she let's go of him, and lets his body fall into the waters he once ruled. She watches a small part of the water turn a blood red.
Lunar Vision: You're not the King of everything… not anymore.
While the others celebrate, and congratulate Vision for finally neutralizing her ultimate enemy, she goes back over to his main room. She looks and feels on the wall for anything strange, until she finds a loose piece of wood. She pulls it back, and finds out that it was blocking a hidden drawer, taking up the bottom half of the wall. She opens it to find a treasure chest. The key already in her hand, most likely right before she released Hook's body into the water. It unlocks, opens it, to reveal… the UCI Hypermedia Championship.
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