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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:37:02 GMT -6
Introduction
The opening of Monday Night Overload begins with the opening fireworks of the stage in the Air Canada Center in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. The cameras pan around the raving fans who sold out this monumental arena. We turn over to Gravedigger, Jimmy Garcia and Sebastian Reid who are sat behind the announce table to issue an announcement.
Jimmy Garcia: Ladies and gentlemen, two weeks ago at Summermania, Betty Adams, the mother of UCI owner Spencer Adams, fought Mama Mustache in a Silver Cougar Fight at Summermania. We are not going to show you the end of that match due to its graphic nature, but as most of you viewers already know, Betty Adams did have a heart attack at the conclusion of the match and was rushed to the hospital. I want to report that she did survive and she is in recovery at the hospital. We wish her all....
“A.D.I.D.A.S.” plays. The crowd immediately begin to boo. Stepping out from the curtain are the Super Stache Brothers, accompanied by Ulysses Nabrow, and of course, Mama Mustache. They all flex their muscles at the top of the aisle.
Jimmy Garcia: Nice. They couldn’t even wait for me to finish my sentence.
Gravedigger: Yes! My favorite part of the show!
He stands up and applauds.
Sebastian Reid: Look how smug Mama Mustache looks! I guess she’s proud of herself after what she did to Betty Adams at Summermania!
The three men hold the bottom rope down for Mama Mustache.
Gravedigger: Chivalry is not dead!
Sebastian Reid: Alright, let’s just get the next sham of a title defense out of the way.
Biff gets in the ring and mockingly blows a kiss to Sebastian.
Gravedigger: Hey Sebastian, how’s your face feel!
He laughs.
Out of nowhere, the crowd begins to roar.
Jimmy Garcia: It’s Spencer Adams speeding down the aisle!
Sebastian Reid: With a chair!
He slides in under the bottom rope and before Biff can suspect anything, Spencer smacks him in the back with the chair. Buff turns around and eats a chair shot as well. Ulysses tries to attack but, you guessed it, he gets crushed with a chair shot. While the three men are left lying on the mat, Spencer turns around a looks at Mama, who has an obvious look of fright on her face. She steps left and right, trying to get out of the ring, but Spencer blocks her way every time. Finally, Spencer charges and pins her in the corner by holding the chair up against her abdomen. He grabs a microphone out of his pocket and begins to speak.
Spencer Adams: Listen up, bitch! I’m not going to beat around the bush! You want a match against me? You got it! At Meltdown, you’re going to face me...in a HELL IN A CELL MATCH!
The crowd cheers.
Spencer Adams: And if somehow, someway, you beat me, I’ll give you that World Title shot, but when I beat you... you’re done here. You’re banned from UCI in all capacities. You’ll never step foot in a UCI arena EVER AGAIN; not as a wrestler, not as a manager, not even as a mom visiting her kids in the locker room. You stay away from this company FOREVER. That’s the fucking terms for this match. You accept?!
Mama says “yes.”
Spencer Adams: WHAT? I DIDN’T HEAR YOU!
Mama screams “yes” over and over again, frantically nodding her head up and down. Spencer starts laughing.
Gravedigger: I think Spencer’s starting to melt down!
Mama looks horrified. A look of serenity comes across Spencer’s face.
Spencer Adams: Good. I’ll see you then, Ursula.
He releases Mama, who runs out of the ring, leaving her family behind.
Jimmy Garcia: Judgment day is going to be upon Mama Mustache in two weeks at Meltdown, and may God have mercy on her soul!
Sebastian Reid: Forget that! May God DAMN Ursula Mustache!
The camera fades as Spencer’s music plays and he watches Mama run down the aisle. |
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:41:17 GMT -6
Triple Threat Match Kaden Vossk vs Sah’ta Thor vs Vincent Pryde
Garcia: Welcome to UCI Overload, coming to you live on SyFy from the Air Canada Centre in Ontario!
Sebastian Reid: And we have an absolutely stacked show lined up for you all; 3 matches from the Rising Stars division!
Garcia: Joe Smarts challenging Kaz Mazy for the TV Championship!
Sebastian Reid: And for our Main Event we have a 7-person Battle Royal for the #1 contendership for the Intercontinental Title!
Garcia: Featuring Sam Kidsgrove,. El Payaso Loco, Alex Richards...
Sebastian Reid: Bolas de Arana,. Dylan Wade, L Verez...
Garcia: And Mr. UCI himself, SHADOWLOVE!
Gravedigger: And you two faggots forgot to mention my man ZMAC facing off with the IC champion Calvin Harris, shit’s gonna be Lit!
Garcia: Erhm… yes, but first we have “The Raging Storm” Sah’ta Thor against newcomers Vincent Pryde and Kaden Vossk in a triple threat match!
Deeper Into You by Ludovico Technique blares over the PA system as Kaden Vossk rushes to the ring, running the ropes a few times before screaming straight into the crowd.
Taylor Lorde: Introducing first, from Tampa, Florida, weighing in at 250 pound, KAYDEN VOSSK!
The opening riff to "Ruina Imperii" by Sabaton echoes through the arena's speaker system as the lights dim. A few seconds pass before an almost demonic looking Sah'ta Thor. He is dressed in a pair of black jeans and a red t-shirt with a golden pattern of the Seven Deadly Sins with the words Sin Incarnate in white. After a moment of standing at the top of the ramp He starts towards the ring with a purposeful stride. Getting to the ring he looks at his foe for the night with a look that promises impending.
Taylor Lorde: From Parts Unknown, weighing in at 225 pounds, “The Raging Storm” SAH’TA THOR!!!
After a moment Sah’ta pulls off his shirt revealing his scarred toned muscular upper body. He turns and starts pacing in the ring as he awaits his final opponents much like a caged animal as he waits for the starting bell.
The lights flicker off and “System” by Korn starts to play and as the beat kicks up, strobes of red and white flicker back and forth. Vincent walks out with his black hair slicked back, he wears his black shades, a black and white jacket, a black choker necklace with a vial of blood hanging from it, Black trunks with white slash marks on the front on either side of his crotch, Pryde written between the slash marks in white lettering with a red outline, a white vampire skull on the back with red blood splatter marks. Pryde also wears black arm sleeves (Hardy esque with the holes), and black boots/kick pads/knee pads that go thigh high. Pryde carries his black cane in a cocky fashion as he blows off the fans who are booing him.
Taylor Lorde: And their opponent, from Leinster, Ireland, standing at 6 foot 2 inches tall and weighing in at 172 pounds, He is the Blood Prince, VINCENT PRYDE!!!
Once in the ring Pryde stands in the middle and holds his cane with hands in front of him as he grins showing his fangs subtlie to the fans. Pryde takes in the hate for a second before backing to his corner and staring down his two opponents.
DING! DING! DING!!!
Garcia: And it’s Kaden Vossk squaring off with Thor right out of the gate, these two golems of muscle trading blows; the ring is shaking with every impact!
Sebastian Reid: Sah’ta with a huge Kesagiri Chop to Vossk, bringing the powerhouse down to one knee!
Gravedigger: The weirdass, vamp kid takes advantage!
Garcia: Pryde with a Running bicycle kick!
Sebastian Reid: Almost like a certain Celtic warrior!
Gravedigger: The fuck was that?
Sebastian Reid: Uh… nothing…
Gravedigger: Yeah, that’s what i thought.
Meanwhile; inside the ring, Pryde has lifted Kaden Vossk to his feet and is setting him up for a DDT.
Garcia: But Vossk fights out of it!
Sebastian Reid: And now it’s Pryde and Vossk trading blows, elbow strikes from Pryde and straight punches from Kaden!
Gravedigger: The vamp kid showing some muay thai skillz as he unleashes a torrent of kicks, driving Vossk towards the ropes!
Garcia: But Sah’ta Thor is back up, he’s running the ropes!
Sebastian Reid: DOUBLE CACTUS CLOTHESLINE, ALL THE MEN ARE OUT OF THE RING!!!
Garcia: And this is a triple threat match, no countout or disqualification!
Gravedigger: I’m pretty sure everyone knows this shit!
Garcia: Management makes me say it, dude.
The three men all slowly make their way to their knees, crawling to different sides of the ring and pulling out weapons for underneath.
Garcia: A sledgehammer for Vossk; Kendo stick for Pryde; and a baseball bat for Sah’ta Thor!!!
The three men slide into the ring at once, all rushing to the middle and swinging for the fences Kaden taking a kendo stick to the face as Pryde takes a bat and Thor takes a swinging sledgehammer(!) to the side of the head respectively, everyone falling to the ground, knocked straight out.
Garcia: And the referee begins the count!
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!
FIVE!
Sebastian Reid: Man, they’re all out cold, this might be the end of the match right here!
SIX!
SEVEN!
Garcia: They’re starting to stir!
EIGHT!
NINE!
Reid: Vossk and Pryde are up to their knees, Thor is stirring!
TEN!
…
Gravedigger: HE MADE IT, THE MAD BASTARD ACTUALLY MADE IT UP AFTER A SLEDGEHAMMER TO THE TEMPLE!!!
Garcia: Thor doesn’t seem to be all there though, he’s swinging wildly around him!
Sebastian Reid: And Vossk is looking to take advantage of that, whipping Pryde into the Raging Storm!
Garcia: Thor grabbing the blood prince and... OH MY!
Gravedigger: JESUS H. CHRIST, OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY OUT OF THE RING, PRYDE MIGHT JUST BE DEAD!
Sebastian Reid: Now Thor turns to Kaden Vossk, running at him with a clothesline!
Garcia: Vossk ducks it, picking Thor up into an Electric Chair!
Gravedigger: THE VILE ECLIPSE, VOSSK WITH THE VILE ECLIPSE!!!
Garcia: VOSSK INTO THE COVER!
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
DING! DING! DING!!!
Taylor Lorde: Here is your winner; KADEN VOSSK!!!
Gravedigger: This was a pretty fucking epic bout, great props to Vossk here, that was textbook multi-man tactics at the end! |
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:42:23 GMT -6
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:45:11 GMT -6
Dark Age Segment
Number of the beast by Iron Maiden begins to play and Air Canada Centre roars out.
Jimmy Garcia: Oh no, here comes The Monster!!
Sebastian Reid: Don't forget, Cheyenne will be will be with Oblivion. They are called The Dark Age!!
Cheyenne crawls through the curtain, her bag of bugs dangles from her mouth.
Gravedigger: Look at her.... The Bug Girl is at her craziest!!
The woman is accompanied by Oblivion's Gatherings. The little red eyed shadows dressed in all black, dance and shout at the audience making little kids cry with mean jokes.
Cheyenne rises and removes the bag raising a mic to her painted lips...
Cheyenne: Woe to you, oh earth and sea
For the Devil sends the beast with wrath
Because he knows the time is short
Let him who hath understanding
Reckon the number of the beast
For it is a human number
Its number is six hundred and sixty six
As she speaks, clips of Oblivion matches play on the Titontron. When she finishes speaking, the guitar rift to Number of the beast by Iron Maiden plays out steps Oblivion and the crowd pops!
Crowd: OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!!
IT walks up to Cheyenne as she looks up with a mix of lust and admiration and runs her hand up his chest. Five 20-something females, with green or blue eyes and black hair strut out in black lacy clothing beside The Monster. The Vixens escort The Dark Age to the ring, they flash their fangs at the crowd and hiss along the way. Then they slowly walk to the ring. Upon reaching the ring apron, Oblivion's Circus , The Gathering disperses to the back.
The Monster goes over the top rope and Cheyenne slides underneath the bottom ringrope. The Dark One goes to the center, of the ring and raises his hands, as Cheyenne crawls between his legs, bag of bugs in mouth, again. Then suddenly, Oblivion thrusts his hands downward, as flames shoot up, from all four ringposts and Cheyenne erupts with screaming laughter.
Jimmy Garcia: Look at these two!!
Sebastian Reid: What?!
Jimmy Garcia: The Dark Age looks like they're about to provide the crowd with a live sex show!!
Gravedigger: Doesn't anyone here know the history of Oblivion?! The Monster doesn't have sex with women. IT RAPES WOMEN!!
Sebastian Reid: But, they look pretty cozy together!! Ironic enough... They look good together!!
Jimmy Garcia: That's not fair!! Why should a monster get laid and not me?!
Gravedigger: Look at you!!
Cheyenne looks up at Oblivion with adoration, as she grabs onto IT...
Oblivion: Later on tonight, The Monster Oblivion with babygirl Cheyenne and her bugs as we take on Umeji and Cormack MacNeill!! We are The Dark Age!!
A viper-constrictor is around The Monster's neck. A few spiders are crawling on Oblivion. The Dark One grasps both sides of IT's neck then spews out IT's "Blue Haze Mist"!!
Oblivion: Umeji!!! MacNeill!!! Tonight we go to war!! MacNeill you're gonna face a very different Oblivion!! You call yourself Big Mack!! But, you're nothing but a little man!! By the end of the match... YOU WILL KISS MY BOOTS!! UCI!! You're looking at the beginning of a beautiful partnership!! WE ARE THE DARK AGE!! UMEJI AND MACNEILL YOU DON'T HAVE A CHANCE... IN... HEEEEEEELLLLLL!!!!!
Oblivion thrusts IT's arms down and fire shoots straight up from the top of the ringposts.
The crowd: THE DARK AGE!! THE DARK AGE!! THE DARK AGE!! THE DARK AGE!!
The Monster climbs up to the second turnbuckle and Cheyenne is at the opposite corner, on the second turnbuckle. Both raises their arms, with fists, to a crowd of cheers, boos and fears. |
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:49:03 GMT -6
Rising Stars Showcase Tag Team Match Cormack MacNeill/Umeji vs Oblivion/Cheyenne
Jimmy Garcia: What a triple threat to start off the show!
Sebastian Reid: Ya what a showing for all three competitors and a big momentum boost to Kaden Vossk heading into Meltdown!
Gravedigger: We still have that huge UCI Intercontinental Championship #1 Contender’s Battle Royal main event coming up as well fellas.
Taylor Lorde: This next match is a tag team match, in the Rising Stars division! Introducing first the team of Cormack MacNeill and Umeji!!!
Gravedigger: These two tough sons of bitches have taken the Rising stars division by storm and tied in a grueling match to face Cordelia Malice in the finals.
Sebastian Reid: Yes and it shall be extra interesting seeing these two men go up against the freshly formed team of Oblivion and Cheyenne, The Dark Age as they introduced themselves as earlier.
“Katana Groove” by Hotei cues a haiku across the screen:
Yesteryear passes
Between the days was a bridge
Forgotten again
Lights dim displaying red, pulsing words to a taiko's beat. The music picks up with the entrance of Umeji, inside drifting fog, followed close by Stuart Mendelsohn. His manager drums up the crowd. Umeji descends the ramp and slides into the ring to no fanfare. His manager circles outside while in route for the turnbuckle. A quick spring lands Umeji atop the ropes. He takes a long breath, spotlights shine around him, sitting before mixed reactions. Two arm pumps throw a white suit jacket into Menedelsohn's outstretched arms. Umeji jumps down into a warmup combo. His music fades behind a high kick held for several seconds.
Jimmy Garcia: Stewie Mendelsohn with his client as always can he keep his client and this next man focus on tonight?
The drone of the pipes fills the air as MacNeill slowly walks out onto the entrance ramp. He stops and looks around at the raucous cheering crowd. He takes a moment and brings his fist to his chest before raising it in salute.
As the drums kick in, MacNeill walks slowly down to the ring, stopping at the end of the ramp to eye the Umejji before climbing up and sliding into the ring. With great ceremony, he unclasps his kilt and hands it to the ring attendant before taking up a position in his corner and using the ropes to stretch out and warm up. Before going back forehead to forehead with Umejji.
Sebastian Reid: Already a bit of tension between Umejji and Cormack maybe? Maybe not as the two shake hands. Honor among warriors guys.
Taylor Lorde: And Introducing next The monster Oblivion and Cheyenne! The Dark Age!
Sebastian Reid: The Dark Age cometh Jimmy!
Jimmy Garcia: Indeed Oblivion and his circus of freaks came out earlier letting the whole world know how he felt.
Gravedigger: How’s it feel Jimbo, even the monster can get a date and you're still alone for ever?
Cheyenne crawls through the curtain, her bag of bugs dangles from her mouth. The woman is accompanied by Oblivion's Gatherings. Little red eyed Midget's dressed in all black dance and shout at the audience making little kids cry with mean jokes.
She rises and removes the bag raising a mic to her painted lips.
Chey: Woe to you, oh earth and sea
For the Devil sends the beast with wrath
Because he knows the time is short
Let him who hath understanding
Reckon the number of the beast
For it is a human number
Its number is six hundred and sixty six
As she speaks Clips of Oblivion matches play on the Titontron. when she finishes speaking and the guitar rift to Number of the beast by Iron Maiden plays out steps Oblivion and the crowd pops!
Crowd: OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!! OBI!!
IT walks up by Cheyenne as she looks up with a mix of lust and admiration and runs her hand up his chest. Five 20-something females, with green or blue eyes and black hair strut out in black lacy clothing beside the monster. The Vixens escort the Team to the ring as they flash their fangs at the crowd and hiss along the way.then slowly walk to the ring. Upon reaching the apron,Oblivion's Circus Gathering disperses to the back as Obi goes over the top rope and Cheyenne slides underneath. The monster goes to the center of the ring and raises his hands as Chey crawls between his legs, bag in mouth again. Then Suddenly Oblivion thrust his hands downward as flames shoot up from all four ringpost and chey erupts with screaming laughter.
Jimmy Garcia: How are Umejji and Cormack not frightened by that!
Gravedigger: Unlike you and Reid real men don't wet themselves with a little theatrics.
Oblivion and Cormack start the match off. Cormac goes in and calls for a test of strength with the monster, who happily accepts. The two giants battle back and forth first Cormack powers Oblivion down to a knee, but Obi powers back up and pushes Cormack backwards. The man does a reverse somersault and gets back up shaking his arms loose. Cormack bounces of the ropes and nails Oblivion with a closeline, but the monster shrugs it off. Big Mack goes in for yet another rebounding closeline and yet again the monster shrugs it off. MacNeil goes for one last closeline but is caught by the throat.
Jimmy Garcia what power on display by these giants.
Mac punches the masked man in the face a couple of times, then brings both elbows down on the arm breaking the choke. Mac throws a right which is retaliated by the monster’s left.
Gravedigger” Good old street fight as both these monstrous men are exchanging blows that would drop any lesser man!
Oblivion headbutts Cormack and it knocks the large man to a knee. Obi then plants him with a large boot to the face. Obi goes in for the pin.
1
2
KICKOUT!
The crowd ahs in disbelief as both men stand yet again and Mack counters a strike from Obi with a series of body blows that end with Oblivion leaving the ground with a turning overhead belly to belly suplex. The monster lands in his corner and is disoriented. Cheyenne reaches for and gets the tag as Cormack also tags in Umejji. Cheyenne drops to all fours and slithers over to Umejji who stares daggers into the crazed woman.
Sebastian Reid: I don't think Cheyenne’s mind games are going work on this pair.
Chey reaches for the man’s leg but he quickly avoids it. Umejji kicks at the woman’s face with a low soccer kick but she rocks back onto her legs and laughs. He goes for a shuffling side kick on the kneeling woman but she catches it and as she stands laughing and wagging a finger, she spins the man around. But Umejji comes around with force and nails the redhead with a hard elbow to the temple, dropping her.
Jimmy Garcia: Oh Oblivion doesnt look like he liked that much! He is attempting to climb in the ring, but Mendelsohn has his ankle!
Gravedigger: Bad move moron! Oblivion has his monstrous hands on Mendelsohn and chokeslams him into the barricade!
Umejji is distracted by his manager and as medical officials come out to help the man to the back Cheyenne jumps the man from behind and locks in a hammerlock. She eventually trips the man and transitions to a crossface.
Sebastian Reid: OH Umejji gets the rope break, just barely.
The Chey holds on till the count of four then breaks she crawls over to the ropes and hangs on the bottom one a bit smiling at the crowd. Umejji rises up and as Cheyenne rises she is struck in the gut with a devastating kick that knocks her threw the ropes and onto the concrete floor. Umejji runs off the far ropes and looks to hit Cheyenne with a suicide dive but as his head pokes through the ropes it is met with the Monster’s large boot. The impact sends Umejji off course and into the steel steps.
Crowd: Holy Shit!!! Holy Shit!!! Holy Shit!!!
Gravedigger as Jimmy and Sebastian gasp: Holy shit is right! Now that's how you counter flippy shit!
Cormack is down and over in a heartbeat, not stopping to check his partner he blows through Cheyenne with a enormous shoulder tackle sending her into the crowd.
Gravedigger: What is wrong with Oblivion instead of attacking Mac he is checking on that bimbo!
Mack roles Umeji back into the ring then gets in his corner as the ref is on 5. Meanwhile Obi carries Cheyenne’s lifeless body back to the ring getting her in right before 10. Tag to Umejji, and Obi reaches over the ropes and tags himself in as well then scoots his fallen partner under the bottom rope.
Jimmy Garcia: Much different side of Oblivion being seen here tonight guys.
Sebastion: This can't be the same guy from WCF.
Gravedigger: The fool needs to focus on his opponents and not his escort!
In the ring Umjei has landed multiple martial arts kicks and finally drops Obi to a knee with two super kicks. Umeji proceeds to land repeating chest kicks before running back a bit turning and landing a running elbow strike to Oblivions head. The asian man climbs to the turnbuckle quick as lighting and lands the shooting star press tucked into an elbow drop.
Sebastian Reid: Tsuchigumo!
Gravedigger: But why isn’t he going for the pin?
Jimmy Garcia: Maybe he knows it will take more than that to end the monster! TAG! Umeji tags Cormack back in.
Oblivion stumbles to his feet as Cormack charges the masked man.
Sebastian Reid: Instant Hangover, But out of nowhere Cheyenne takes the brunt of the kick!
Gravedigger: That crazy bitch just leapt in the ring and took a running brogue kick from the monstrous Cormack.
Jimmy Garcia: She may be seriously hurt!
Oblivions on his knees with her head on his lap as Cormack stares at the large masked man.
Cormack tags in Umeji and he runs looking to nail the Instant Hangover on Obi this time but it is dodged as the large man rolls out of the way. Umeji bounces chest first off the turnbuckle and then is belly to back suplexed across the ring. Oblivion delivers a running boot to Cormack knocking him off the apron. The monster proceeds to climb the turnbuckle.
Gravedigger: Holy shit the monster is perched on the top turnbuckle!
Sebastian Reid: OBI-SAULT! I didn't think the large man could fly! One! Two! The Dark Age wins! What does this mean for the two that will be facing off again later for the spot in the Rising Stars tourney!? |
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:49:49 GMT -6
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:53:07 GMT -6
Kaz Mazy & Zombie McMorris Segment
Heavy guitar distortion cuts through the arena as all the lights shut off, minus a gaggle of blue and green on the stage. They all aim at the tron which is showing an unorthodox entrance video. It shows UCI Superstar Kaz Mazy performing daring feats all in Super Nintendo fighting game graphics ala Mortal Kombat.
"FIGHT!!!"
"2nd Sucks" by A Day To Remember starts blaring as lights explode throughout the arena and the words growl sending a shiver up every collective spine in attendance. The battle cry makes men sprout thick and all the baddest of poons wet. Every child in attendance grows hair on their ballsack and they reach for the nearest bong and start tokin' up!
Spotlights center on one of the entrances in the crowd where Kaz stands, kendo holstered to his back, waving that Old Glory Poon Guinean Flag with the Ham' n' Sick' and the Fitty Stars and Thickteen Bars.
Kaz walks out on the stage with the TV Championship around his shoulder.
Crowd: KAZ! KAZ! KAZ!
Kaz walks down the ramp and towards the ring. When he gets into the ring he holds the TV Championship up high as the crowd pops. He grabs a mic from Taylor Lorde then addresses the crowd.
Kaz: Now the other week at Summermania, ya boi yung Kaz-Munstah went and done did what he set out to do. He won this TV Championship for the good and the THE-YICK. A lot of people out there said that it couldn’t be done, that ol’Z is just too much; that this was just luck. To that, I just have to say: This isn’t luck. This was Communism pure and simple!
Crowd: Kaz! Kaz! Kaz!
Kaz: And now that I am the New TV Champi- - --
“Killed by Death” hits the PA system.
Jimmy Garcia: Oh no, things might get a little violent.
Sebastian Reid: Zombie McMorris is on his way to the ring.
ZMAC stands at the top before making his way down to the ring. Kaz stays on the mic addressing ZMAC, without fear.
Kaz: What, did you come down to be a sore loser? To pout and talk about your coked up self? Ain’t no one cares but it’s a good thing you here. You know I don’t like to talk trash behind someones back. I rather just punch them in the face and get it over with.
ZMAC climbs into the ring and they have a stare down. Still, Kaz is without fear.
Kaz: If’n you wanna jump, jump. You wana come out here and start sumthin, lets start it. However, if’n you just want to stand there with your chest all out, I’mma keep talkin. We had a hell of a match and I want you to know, any time you want a rematch. Anytime.
ZMAC snatches the miv out of Kaz’s hand.
ZMAC: I didn’t kum out here for a rematch. If’n I wanted MY belt back, I’d just take a the shit. But you and me, we been fighting a lot. Lot longer than either of us care to remember.
Kaz takes the mic back from ZMAC.
Kaz: Yah, son. A lot longer. We been fighting like cats and dogs, since I broke in this BIZ’NIZ and truthfully, it aint even worth it. I think you be seein what I be seein. I think you SEA the landscape changin’ and it ain’t THICK WITH IT.
ZMAC nods in agreement.
Kaz: So yah, we can fight forever and ever. We can fight till I’m an old man and you’re still snorting coke off of big tittay Latina bitches or – OR – we can do sumthing about it. Me and you.
The crowd starts to heat up as the two approach each other.
Kaz Mazy: I SEA a cuppa' Tag Team titles that ain't got numbuh one contendahs!
The crowd absolutely lights up as ZMAC takes the mic from Kaz.
ZMAC: Kaz n I? We know a little a somethin' about gang bangs...so Faggot Whackit Bros? Start
Crowd: SPREADIN_DA_NEWS!
ZMAC: Start
Crowd: SPREADIN_YA_CHEEKS!
Kaz takes the mic.
Kaz Mazy: BOOTY_TROMBONE_COWBOY HAT, RECOGNIZE!
He drops the mic and extends his hand out to ZMAC, who shakes it with fervor.
Sebastian Reid: What the hell did we just witness?
Jimmy Garcia: History, Sebastian! We just witnessed the birth of the newest, oldest tag team of this generation!
The scene fades to black as the two pace the ring. |
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:55:55 GMT -6
Rising Stars Showcase Ryan Alberight vs Karlie Nash
Jimmy Garcia: We got ourselves a good one here!!
Sebastian Reid: Oh yes we do!!
Gravedigger: Are you two listening to yourselves?!
Jimmy Garcia: What?!
Sebastian Reid: What we do?!
Gravedigger just stares daggers, shaking his head with absolute disgust at Jimmy Garcia and Sebastian Reid.
Aphasia by Europe hits the PA system as Ryan Albright walks to the ring with mild excitement, trying to pump the crowd up on his way to the ring. He makes his way down the ramp
Taylor Lorde: Coming down to the ring from The City of Brotherly Love... Weighing in at two hundred and thirty pounds. He is Righteous Ryan Albright!!
Standing on the apron, Albright wiping his feet and taunting the crowd.
Jimmy Garcia: He looks ready!!
Sebastian Reid: All we need is The Cougar Hunter!!
Gravedigger: We'll be waiting forever!! You know how long it takes women to get ready. Am I right?! Or am I right?! Karlie Nash is all woman!!
: War Machine by AC/DC plays in the arena, Tracy steps on the stage and moves to the side, Karlie steps on the stage, Tracy and Karlie walks to the ring showing disdain for the crowd.
Taylor Lorde: From St. Paul, Minnesota... Weighing in at one hundred and seventy two pounds... She is The Cougar Hunter!! Karlie Naaaash!!
Tracy walks up the steps and enters the ring, Karlie climbs the ropes from outside and flashes the loser sign to the crowd, she then climbs down and stretches in her corner.
*DING!!-DING!!*
Jimmy Garcia: This match is underway!!
Both competitors circle the ring...
Sebastian Reid: Both hook-up with a collar and elbow tie-up.
The slightly larger Albright uses his size advantage and pushes Karlie Nash into the turnbuckles. But, the referee is right there to break it up...
Referee: ONE!! TWO!! THREE!! FOUR!!
Ryan Albright backs up with his hands up...
THWACK!!!
Jimmy Garcia: Hey!! That's not right!! Karlie Nash just jammed a thumb in the eye of Ryan Albright!!
Righteous Ryan stumbles with a hand over his eye.
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Gravedigger: Picture perfect dropkick!!
The inability of not able to see with the force of the dropkick causes Ryan Albright to crash into the corner... Bouncing off the turnbuckles...
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Sebastian Reid: The Cougar Hunter catches her opposition with a rebound spine buster!! She's going for the pin!!
The crowd: ONE!!
The crowd: TWO!!
The crowd: THREEEEEEEE!!! NOOOOOO!!
KICKOUT!!
Ryan Albright exits the ring and Karlie Nash follows behind him.
FWAPP!!
Karlie grabs her mouth after Albright caught her with a back elbow.
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Righteous Ryan slams Karlie's head on the ring apron.
Ryan Albright: I got her now!! Whoo!!
Karlie Nash spins around, grabbing Righteous Ryan...
WHAM-WHAM-WHAM-WHAM!!!
Gravedigger: Karlie Nash just knocked Ryan Albright stupid with multiple headbutts!!
Ryan Albright is staggering around like a drunk individual...
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Jimmy Garcia: Big boot!!
Sebastian Reid: Ryan Albright looks hurt!!
Gravedigger: The Cougar Hunter is measuring Ryan Albright...
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Jimmy Garcia: Clothesline from Hell!!
Karlie Nash rolls Ryan Albright in the ring. Righteous Ryan is staggering around. The Cougar Hunter grabs Ryan Albright...
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Sebastian Reid: I think Karlie Nash just killed Ryan Albright with The Upper Body Injury!!
Ryan Albright is twitching from the double undertook piledriver. The Cougar Hunter makes the pin cover...
The crowd: ONE!!!
The crowd: TWO!!!
The crowd: THREEEEEE!!!
[DING!! DING!! DING!!]
Taylor Lorde: Winner of the match... "The Cougar Hunter" Karlie Nash!!! |
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:56:43 GMT -6
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Post by Results on Aug 14, 2017 23:58:21 GMT -6
Avery Miles Segment
The cameras move backstage as Dani Applegate is standing with a microphone in hand against a backdrop with the UCI Logo. She is not joined by anyone on camera, but the shot is focused in on her. She pulls the microphone to her mouth.
Dani: Ladies and gentleman, I am excited to be standing here with someone that... as of this afternoon, is part of the UCI Roster. He is...
The camera pans back as a man standing just over six foot tall wearing a light blue button up shirt, a burgundy vest, and a pair of dark jeans comes into the view.
Dani: Avery Miles III.
Avery smiles and nods his head.He reaches out and cordially shakes Dani’s hand. He gives enough space as to not crowd her as the camera pulls back.
Avery: Thank you Miss Applegate. I am excited to be here in Toronto; I was here a few months ago and enjoyed my time.
Dani: Well, Mr. Miles, I hope that you are enjoying the show.
Avery: I am. And I am glad to be a part of the roster. I am happy to say that I have agreed to a limited schedule with UCI at this time. And I am excited to be on the next show as well.
Dani: Do you have any one specifically on the roster you would like to tangle with?
Avery: To be honest with you, this is all a whirlwind. I was in California just a few days ago checking out some young, new talent in West Coast Genesis. And now? Here I am.
He smiles and looks off camera for a moment, before returning focus to Dani and answering her questions.
Avery: There are quite a few names on the roster that I am not familiar with. Though I do recognize one name on the roster from Indy Pro Wrestling; Bolas de Arana. He did not really cross paths, but I would be excited to wrestle anyone inside of the ring and cannot wait until my first opponent is named.
Dani: One last question, Mr. Miles. You are a documented former champion a few different companies. New Generation Wrestling. Indy Pro Wrestling. Guerreros of Lucha. And even fought for the top title in a couple of other companies. My question is, why UCI? Why now?
He smiles and crosses his arms.
Avery: That is easy. A challenge. Something new. I wanted to come into a place that I had no real connection to. I did that in Guerreos of Lucha. I won the Super Falcon Cup, and then went on to be the longest reigning Rey de Reyes Champion. I am always up for a new challenge.
Dani: Again, glad to have you Mr. Miles. And welcome.
Avery: And thank you.
He smiles as the cameras fade back into the arena. |
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Post by Results on Aug 15, 2017 0:03:14 GMT -6
Rising Stars Showcase Cordelia Malice vs Matt Angel
Jimmy Garcia: We have good one coming up!!
Gravedigger: Why must you sound like a dork, every once in awhile?!
Jimmy Garcia: What?!
Gravedigger: HA-HA-HA-HA!!!
Sebastian Reid: Guys!! Guys!! Guys!! We have a match coming up!!
Gravedigger: Well, he did!!
"I will Show You" by From Ashes To New blasts from the PA system, Matt Angel walks out and with his arms raised he walks down the ramp way high-fiving the fans.
Taylor Lorde: Making his way to the ring... From Venice Beach, California... But, resides in Los Angeles, California... Weighing in at one hundred and eighty pounds... Matt Angel!!
He jumps onto the apron and climbs the turnbuckle and also celebrates cheering to the fans.
Jimmy Garcia: These Toronto fans seems to be behind Matt Angel!!
Gravedigger: Whoopie friggin' do!! Bring out Cordelia Malice and let's get this match started!!
Cordelia Malice wearing a full length leather duster steps out to a single spotlight then the music begins to play. It builds to a crescendo and she raises her head and smiles while petting her cat Misty. She slowly walks down to the music...
Taylor Lorde: Coming to the ring from Helltown, Ohio... Weighing in at one hundred and sixty one pounds... This is Miss Malice Cordelia Malice!!
Cordelia gets to the ring. She puts her cat down gingerly on a stool waiting for the feline. She sits there looking around as Cordelia walks up the steps and climbs under the bottom rope into the ring. She removes her coat and hands it to a runner by ringside and speaks to her cat giving her commands as she waits for the match to begin.
[DING-DING!!]
Jimmy Garcia: Alright!! This match has great potential!!
Gravedigger pinches the space between its eyes, with his eyes closed, with complete disgust slowly shaking his head.
Gravedigger: *sigh* Garcia, you're so annoying!!!
Both competitors circle the ring...
Half the crowd: LET'S GO ANGEL!!!
Other half of the crowd: LET'S GO CORDELIA!!!
Half of the crowd: LET'S GO ANGEL!!!
Other half of the crowd: LET'S GO CORDELIA!!!
Matt Angel catches Cordelia off guard with forearm smash, quickly followed that up with a hurricanrana.
Jimmy Garcia: Miss Malice is down!!
Sebastian Reid: Matt Angel is going for the pin!!
The crowd: ONE!!
The crowd: TWO!!
The crowd: THREEEEEE..... NOOOO!!
KICKOUT!!
Miss Malice shakes her head to get the "cobwebs" out. Both competitors charge towards at each other and hook up with a collar and elbow hook up.
Sebastian Reid: Cordelia Malice tosses into corner... HARD!!!
Jimmy Garcia: Matt Angel hits those turnbuckles very hard!!
Gravedigger: You sir, are a nerd!!
Cordelia Malice runs towards Matt Angel....
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Gravedigger: STINGER SPLASH!!!
Jimmy Garcia: Miss Malice going for the pin!!!
The crowd: ONE!!!
The crowd: TWO!!!
The crowd: THREEEEEEE!!! NOOOOOO!!!
KICKOUT!!!!
Miss Malice picks up Matt Angel...
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Gravedigger: Where did THAT come from?!
Matt Angel nails Cordelia Malice with a Roundhouse kick and picks her back up and nails her with a snap suplex!!
WHOOSH-WHAM!!
Sebastian Reid: LIONSAULT!!!
Angel grabs Malice tosses her into ropes, Miss Malice bounces off the ropes, Matt Angel springboards towards Cordelia Malice....
Gravedigger: ...but Miss Malice ducks out of the way!!
Matt Angel landed near the corner, leaning, seating against the turnbuckles. Cordelia charges towards the seated Angel.
WHOOSH-WHAM!!!
Jimmy Garcia: CANNONBALL!!
Sebastian Reid: WOW!!!
Cordelia Malice picks up Matt Angel....
WHOOSH-WHAM!!!
Gravedigger: Enziguri!!
WHAM!!
Jimmy Garcia: RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP!!
Angel picks up Miss Malice...
WHAM!!!
Jimmy Garcia: MALICE LOCK!!!
Sebastian Reid: Miss Malice has it hooked in!!!
Matt Angel is flopping all over the place, until Cordelia gets Angel onto the ground.
Jimmy Garcia: Cordelia Malice has Matt Angel on the mat.
Gravedigger: He isn't going anywhere!!
[DING-DING-DING!]
Taylor Lorde: The winner of this match... Cordelia Malice!! |
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Post by Results on Aug 15, 2017 0:05:31 GMT -6
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Post by Results on Aug 15, 2017 0:08:44 GMT -6
O’Shay Segment
The show comes back from a brief commercial break, as the camera pans the sold out crowd of the Air Canada Centre. They cheer as the camera passes them by, and hold up signs for their favorite UCI superstars, as well as a few middle fingers. Just then Boom from P.O.D. Begins to play over the audio system, as the tron lights up with a intro video never seen before. '
Gravedigger: Who the hell is this?
A man walks out in a purple robe, with white feather trim. He has short red hair and a jaw line beard. Behind him is a big booty, or BBW black woman. Which I guess makes her BBBW. She a big bitch either way, but in a sexy classy way, despite the fact her giant cleavage is showing. She herself is in a black sparkling evening gown, with black high heels, and her hair did. The man in front of her poses, holding his arms out like Jesus as he looks up to the sky and spins. This reveals the giant picture of himself on the back of the robe, with the words 'Touch that and holla back' written across the shoulders. He begins strutting his way down the ramp, and the fans can already sense this guy is a shit brick. He stops as his lady friend climbs up the steps first. Only to hold the rope for him so he can enter the ring. Class act that he is, he poses one more time. He is then handed a mic, and stands in the middle of the ring, where his lady friend holds a hand held mirror for him to admire himself. After a few moments the fan begin to become restless. The man smiles as he looks around at the fans, and slowly raises the microphone to his face.
“What I need for you fat, lazy, mud puddle bathing, hockey lovin, trailer park trash living, health care given Canucks to do, is shut the fuck up while I introduce myself to your fat toothless wives! (Fans boo loudly) My name is Shaun O'Shay, and what you are looking at is not only the perfect specimen of a man. But the future of sports entertainment. I am what your wives and daughters dream about, and what you fail at achieving. I am, simply put... The greatest thing to grace this business in the history of history!”
Shaun smells the air enjoying the rush of boos from the fans. He then smiles and continues, as he begins pacing back and forth.
Shaun O'Shay: Now I could come out here, and brag about my past accomplishments, boast about some bullshit I did in some other fed. I could be like every other douche nugget that enters a new place, and tell everyone in the back, that I am gunning for them.
Shaun pauses and smiles and looks up at the camera.
Shaun O'Shay: But I am sure they already know.
He goes back to pacing once again.
Shaun O'Shay: I could talk about the countless matches and men I have battled. I could talk about my rise in the business and only being 21 years of age. I could. But..
Shaun looks around at the fans and smiles.
Shaun O'Shay: This place is just not worth it, nor are you people here. Especially you people here, I mean my god! Honestly, who books events in fucking Canada? Canadians are the worse. Give me a Mexican any day, at least he works for his benefits, and I get a bottle of Tequila. Fuck has Canada ever done? Besides destroying the world with fucking Nickelback!? Fuck Canada! HaHA (Morris day style laugh)
Fans are extremely pissed now, cause, well it's Canada.
Shaun O'Shay: What? You gonna pull the Hart family outcha ass. I piss on the Hart's and their so called “Legacy”!
Riot about to start, O'Shay should maybe sneak out the back. The anger can be felt in Japan. Shutting up here and walking away would be the wise thing. However, Shaun doesn't think that way. Mainly cause he don't give a shit. Shaun goes back to pacing as he continues.
Shaun O'Shay: I'll lay off Canada, since the truth makes your poopers pucker. Speaking of truth. Let me spit some. I am not here because I really enjoy mediocre talent, in hopes of making my name in the great United Championship what the fuck ever you calling this shit. I am here because my old boss was a money grubbing ass clown, who decided to sell my contract to the highest bidder. To say I am not here to make friends, and please you losers is a huge understatement. But now that I am here....
Shaun pauses for dramatic effect, before looking up at the camera. Vignette 101, a classic move. Look it up kids.
Shaun O'Shay: Now that I am here, I plan on making you KNOW my name. Not cause you want to, but because you have to! You will be seeing me out here, sticking my boot in doo doo cutters, Moon walking that shit dry. My hand will be raised more times than you are wanting! My face will cover all the magazines and you will buy all my merchandise. Cause in time, you may not like me. But you damn well will respect me!
Shaun smiles as he looks into the camera.
Shaun O'Shay: That goes for any of you fart sniffing rejects in the back as well. A woman as world champion? Dafuck!? There is your first problem. World champion. Probably takes a week off once a month I bet! (Extreme roar of women boos are heard) Calm down ladies. Soon you will all see what a real sports entertainer looks like. While you are laying on your back, sucking wind. Watching me stand over you in victory, possibly with whatever lame ass title you hold. Take some notes, and just remember. You aren't me. You're not better than me. And I am so much prettier than you! Now touch that and holla back!
Shaun O'Shay drops the mic, and poses once again as his lady friend begins clapping. The fans however are tossing things in the ring. Cups, bags, the program, baby diaper. What ever they can reach pretty much. The scene then fades out, as P.O.D. Begins to play once again. |
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Post by Results on Aug 15, 2017 0:13:22 GMT -6
UCI Television Championship Kaz Mazy © vs Joe Smarts
Sebastian Reid: It's TV Title time! The first title defence for our new champion, Kaz Mazy!
Gravedigger: Ugh… Don't remind me. I miss Z-MAC as champion already.
Sebastian Reid: You, and no one else.
The opening beats of 'Catgroove' plays throughout the arena as the crowd goes silent. As the music continues, a faint voice echoes around the arena. The only words that are understandable are
'Dams it, the mic is toos quiet.'
Then a deafening voice can be heard over the arena saying
'HERE COME... OH FUCKS, IT TOOS LOUD!!!'
Finally, as the final part of the opening beats of Catgroove plays, a reasonably loud microphone can be heard throughout the arena.
'Here come the World Smartsest Man, Captain Bruddahhood, JOE SMAAAAAARTS!!!!
Then the crowd realises that Joe fiddled with the mic volume, and they cheer out loud when he struts out on stage, doing a Scotty 2 Hotty dance down, I suppose, as the main part of Catgroove plays.
Joe climbs up the steps, and falls over the ropes into the ring. He then taps his head, as he fails to try and display his “intelligence”.
Gravedigger: Okay, so I'm not big on Kaz winning the title, but I’d much rather have him with the title than this idiot.
Jimmy Garcia: Wow, I actually agree with you there.
Sebastian Reid: Are we actually all on the same page?
Gravedigger: What the fuck is happening here?
Heavy guitar distortion cuts through the arena as all the lights shut off, minus a gaggle of blue and green on the stage. They all aim at the tron which is showing an unorthodox entrance video. It shows UCI Superstar Kaz Mazy performing daring feats all in Super Nintendo fighting game graphics ala Mortal Kombat.
"FIGHT!!!"
"2nd Sucks" by A Day To Remember starts blaring as lights explode throughout the arena and the words growl sending a shiver up every collective spine in attendance. The battle cry makes men sprout thick and all the baddest of poons wet. Every child in attendance grows hair on their ballsack and they reach for the nearest bong and start tokin' up!
Spotlights center on one of the entrances in the crowd where Kaz stands, kendo holstered to his back and the Television Title around his waist, waving that Old Glory Poon Guinean Flag with the Ham' n' Sick' and the Fitty Stars and Thickteen Bars.
Crowd: KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ!
Kaz leaps the barricade and slides into the ring. He taunts to the crowd from the second rope and they explode in Kaz cheers once again.
Crowd: KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ! KAZ!
Kaz leans against the turnbuckle, holding up his new TV Title as his music fades and awaits the start of the match.
Sebastian Reid: Kaz looking confident after his TV Title win against Z-MAC.
Gravedigger: The sooner this match ends, the better.
Taylor Lorde: This content is set for one fall!
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
Taylor Lorde: And is for the Television Championship! First, the challenger. From Smartstopia, weighing in at 150lbs! JOEEEEE SMAAAAAARTS!!!
Joe Smarts taps his head vigorously, once again attempting to show off his “intelligence”, the crowd cheering him on.
Gravedigger: I don't know who's more stupid. Joe Smarts, or his idiotic fanbase.
Jimmy Garcia: I guess they just appreciate the silliness.
Gravedigger: It's not “silliness”. It's stupidity. Kind of like your stupid face.
Taylor Lorde: And his opponent!
The crowd instantly goes nuts.
Taylor Lorde: from the People's Republic of Poon Guinea. Weighing in at two hundred and five pounds. He is the UCI Television Champion! He is Young Thickness! THE GODSON OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING! KAAAAAZ MAAAAAAAZY!!!
The crowd roars for the new Television Champion as he holds his title up high for all to see.
Sebastian Reid: This crowd is on fire! They are excited to see Kaz defend his title!
*DING DING DING*
Joe Smarts instantly starts running. But he isn't running towards the champion. He's running around him.
Gravedigger: Oh, what the fuck is this?
Jimmy Garcia: I couldn't tell ya…
Sebastian Reid: I think he's been binge watching episodes of “The Flash”.
Gravedigger: I can't believe this… Can I bash my head against the announce table?
Sebastian Reid: By all means!
Joe Smarts continues to run around the Television Champion. Kaz just looking disappointedly at Smarts.
Joe Smarts: I's makes you dizzy! Mwahahaha!!!
Jimmy Garcia: RKAZRO!!! RKAZRO!!! That's how he beat Z-MAC to win his title!
Sebastian Reid: He's going for the pin.
1!
2!
3!!!
*DING DING DING*
Gravedigger: Thank god that's over!
Jimmy Garcia: A quick defense for the new champion.
Sebastian Reid: He almost looks disappointed at how easy it was for him. Looking down at the fallen Joe Smarts.
Gravedigger: I'd be disappointed too, if I had to deal with such stupidity… |
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Post by Results on Aug 15, 2017 0:14:24 GMT -6
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